Fun Star: Gaming clubs wage war against each other

This article is a work of satire, and is not intended to be taken seriously in any way. Any resemblance to actual events or real people is purely coincidental, and should not be regarded with any degree of seriousness.


Matt tries to pull a sneak attack on the E-sports Gaming Club members. One member is alerted to the presence of this danger.

War broke out between the two main game clubs, Board Game and Tabletop Club and E-Sports Gaming Club, when Board Game Club infiltrated E-Sports on March 30.

Last Friday Board Game Club snuck into the Gaming Clubs Club room and fought to show their superiority. Though Board Game Club has fewer members they took on E-Sports with full force. One member of Board Game Club took a controller and chucked it at unsuspecting E-Sports members. Quickly the members of both clubs broke into a fist fight.

30 minutes went by before the clubs stepped back and called a tentative truce. Out of breath and sore from the fight, Board Game Club members slunk back to their meeting room.

Although the battle that broke out became violent, the police were not called, so no one was arrested.

“That was a fight? I thought they were just LARPing,” said Todd Sherman, Dean of Liberal Arts, who was in the building at the time.

E-Sports Gaming Club is an open to all club that sets up various consoles for members to play. E-Sports has a variety of games that they offer for new comers to help ready themselves for battle against the Board Game Club.

“We have Smash-4 wii-U, PM (project M) that’s becoming more popular for the Wii, and then we’re trying to bring back Melee,” said member Tendai Shambare. “We also have Dragon Ball Fighter Z.”

Board Game and Tabletop Club is also open to all and they play any form of card game, board game, and tabletop game to use for strategy for plotting their next attack.

“We try to play as many games as possible. We play Betrayal at House on The Hill, Red Dragon Inn, Boss Monster, Love Letter, Netrunner, Magic: The Gathering,” said Jacob Mann, the Club President of Board Game Club. “A list of all of our games is on our Orgsync page.”

Right now both clubs are carrying on as they were before. Board Game and Tabletop Club meets Fridays in Grue 202 2-8 p.m. and E-Sports Gaming Club also meets on Fridays in Grue 208 4-8 p.m. Readers can learn more about both clubs ongoing battle for members by visiting their Orgsync pages. Although members from both clubs claimed superiority over the other and urge readers to visit their Orgsync page instead.

You may also like...